When It Sinks To Me That Life is Indeed Too Short

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It was last February 7 when Jun received a call from Mommy (my mother in law) telling him that she was on bed rest because she fell on the stairs.  Jun was already in panic mode but then Mommy explained that it was only the last step of the stair that she fell on, bruises lang naman daw and that she just needed a first aid.   

Owkay fine.  Hindi naman pala ganun kalala.  However, we still wanted to visit her to personally check on her.  FYI, my mother in law is so close to me.  As in we are really close. We check each other thru texts every now and then.  She always call me in our office just to make chika.  We talk everything under the sun.  Alam niya lahat ng nangyayari sa buhay namin ni Jun.  She counsels us whenever we needed it.  She is so sweet, generous, and very thoughtful.  She is like a real mother to me. Nararamdaman ko 'yun ng wagas and I really thank her for that. I love her and she is like a real mother to me, my second mom.
And so we went to their house immediately.  When I first saw her, I thought that she was fine, however, she already had a difficult time standing and moving on the bed maybe because the bruise was still fresh.  She had a schedule with Papa (my father in law) together with Papa's siblings and father to Bohol for five days. They were balikbayans so they wanted to tour them out.

Fast forward, five days after their vacation, Mommy called me at the office that she was really in pain and that she felt depressed daw.  The pain aggravated because of the long walks on their stay to Bohol.  Hindi ko ma-explain ang naramdaman ko noon.  I feel so sad that she feels that way.  Awang awa ako sa kanya because she's not that young anymore to suffer on that kind of pain.  She is already 73. I just told her to be strong and to manage her emotions as well. Sometimes kasi she tends to dwell too much on her emotions kaya lalo siyang nadadala. I also prayed for her.  God has He's own ways, hindi Niya siya pababayaan.  

Yesterday, we visited her again to check the progress of her condition.  I can see na namayat talaga siya.  Papa said that she was not eating well. Twice lang daw sa isang araw and ang konti pa.  She had a hard time peeing because she literally can't stand.  She was in pain. Sumisigaw konting galaw lang.  I also saw the effort that Papa is doing for her. Siya lang ang kasama niya the whole day assisting her. He is also old na.  And I felt pain dahil nakikita kong talagang nahihirapan siya with Mommy's condition.  No words can also explain the pain that I saw in my husband's eyes.  Seldom do I saw him like that.  He dearly love her mother very much.  I could attest na lahat gagawin niya just to make her mom happy.  I'm crying deep inside.

Thank God, the x-ray result found no fracture on Mommy's leg.  He answered our prayers. He is really and amazing God!

Another story.  While driving on the way home, Jun told me that while he was accompanying Daddy (his lolo), Daddy told him "Itoy, patay na ako."  He was so shocked daw! Daddy is already 90 years old but hearing those words, regardless of age, is the saddest words anyone could hear.  I mean talking about death is not bad and is definitely not wrong. ALL of us will be facing death and it is only God who could decide when is our time.  It just make him feel sad because the last time he saw his lolo was 3 years ago and he's very active pa talaga! I remember us (Jun, Mommy, Daddy) strolling pa noon sa MOA and Market! Market! the last time they were here in the Philippines. Lakad pa kami ng lakad, and Daddy still can walk without assistance.  Kaya ayun, nalungkot c Jun beacause nag flashback daw sa kanya lahat ng good memories niya with his lolo while he was still very active.

Nag-reminisce kami Jun.  I reflected.  I ask him, "Minsan ba nakikita mo na nagiging masama ako sa mga magulang ko?" He said that It's only me who can answer that.  But kilala naman daw niya ako, he believe that I did some things for a reason.  Bigla akong na-guilty.  I know deep inside me that I am not a perfect daughter.  I have done so many bad things in my life.  I have hurt my parents countless times.  I disappoint them at times and me being a hard headed person became very difficult for them to handle.    However, God knows and he can attest, that I love them so much.  I may not express it physically and emotionally (which is my deepest regret until now!), but I am trying hard to express it in my own ways.  Its a work in progress, everyone.  I am not a touchy person, I am not clingy, but I promise with all my heart that no one can hurt them, for as long as I live.  I cried during our talk kasi naisip ko na matatanda nadin ang parents ko.  The world is moving and nothing can stop that.  It is never too late for me to show them how thankful I am to have them as my parents.  Hindi natin alam kung hanggang kailan na lang tayo at kung hanggang kailan na lang ang mga tao na malalapit sa ating buhay.  

If you can, during your free time, please reflect.  Think of those people whom you love deeply and express them the gratitude for having them.  A simple note will be nice.  A simple text, phone call, gift, or any little/simple things that you can do will definitely make them happy.  Ako, I tried not raising my voice whenever Nanay and I had some disagreement at times.  We see to it na wala sa amin iyon.  Magbabatian kami agad kasi siguro deep inside our hearts nadun padin ang respect namin sa isat-isa.  It's okay to be angry, that's normal. But holding grudges unto someone is a different thing.  Napaka bigat sa loob nyan mga kapatid at pwede niyo ikamatay 'yan.

Life is sooo short.  Kung pwede nga lang talagang hatakin ang oras gagawin ko!  

When it comes to my family naman, I always make sure that Jun will always feel loved by me.  I say it vocally and through actions.  We also like cuddling our children EVERYTIME that we are with them.  Saying I love you to us is just like a normal chit chat na to us but full of meaning.  We make it a point that Jun and I always find ways to express our deep love and concern to them.  They are our life, the purpose of our living, the reason why we breathe, the reason that God truly loves us.

It is never too late for all of us.  Shower your love!

=)

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 Update:  We needed a third opinion because it seems like the bruise has becoming more painful everyday.  True enough, when we rushed Mommy at St. Lukes last night, she was diagnosed to have femoral neck fracture or hip fracture in short.  Please do pray for her for she will undergo the operation today.

 Also, Daddy was diagnosed to have a mild stroke just yesterday.  He will undergo a CT scan anytime now.  

 God is with us all the time and we all know that they will be healed in Jesus name.


About Mastermom Speaks

Hi! I'm Ma. Celin Mendoza but Celin will do. I'm a peace worker, youngest daughter, entrepreneur, contented wife, devoted and meticulous mom of 3 June's and a DIY addict!!! This blog will be your ultimate partner in crime when the going gets tough =) Want to do something interesting together? Shoot me an email to: macelinmendoza@gmail.com

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Hello, I'm Celin!

Hi! I'm Ma. Celin Mendoza but Celin will do. I'm a peace worker, youngest daughter, entrepreneur, contented wife, devoted and meticulous mom of 3 June's and a DIY addict!!! This blog will be your ultimate partner in crime when the going gets tough =) Want to do something interesting together? Shoot me an email to: macelinmendoza@gmail.com

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